There are simple ways to bring greater happiness to your everyday.
Whilst some of the tips below are hard to implement, remembering your 'why' behind a habit change will help you in the long run to have more positive moments in your day to day life. Start by trialing 1 or 2 of these this week and noticing how you feel, then work to add more into your routine until you end up in a place where you have an array of regular things you do and ways you think that truly benefit you.
Here goes, let's start kicking the habits that don't serve you:
1. False kindness
It can sometimes feel as if our society walks on eggshells, avoiding tough conversations. People aren’t getting the critical feedback that they need in order to grow.
Create an inner circle that will give you honest feedback. You don't need to take on everything that's said to you as a fact, but it'll be useful to hear truthful opinions from those around you that you trust so that you can feel into whether there is value directly in what they're saying or indirectly because hearing their (potential) difference of opinion makes you feel more strongly that your decision is correct, despite it not being the same as others whom you trust.
2. Learning as procrastination
Only applied knowledge is power. We often use what could be extremely insightful learning opportunities as times to not fully concentrate, for example reading a really interesting book to send us to sleep or having a programme on in the background whilst we eat that actually could teach us a lot if we engaged with it.
Use the mantra: 'learn, earn, return' next time you want to make sure what you're taking in is going to be able to stick.
3. No white space
Find yourself to be an addict for listening to podcasts, watching documentaries or reading books? Alex, Founder of Favourite Positions, has been there herself:
‘My total podcast listening time was a few hours a day, then I’d go to bed with a stimulating book and try to cram in new knowledge. I wore this personal development hunger like a badge of honour until I realised I was drowning out my own ideas. YOUR ideas are valuable, too.’
Tune-in. To do that, it’s important to have time where you turn off external stimulation.
4. Saying ‘yes’ to everything
Whether it’s new work projects or social gatherings, saying ‘yes’ to things you don’t have time for leads to burnout. Instead, make 'no' your default.
In the words of Mark Manson: ‘if it’s not a fuck yes, it’s a no’.
5. Never being alone
Society has programmed us to think it’s weird to do things alone. The problem is: if you’re not comfortable being alone, you’ll never be comfortable leaving toxic relationships.
A person who’s happy alone is a powerful person.
6. Perfectionism
Perfectionism is more curse, less blessing. The #1 factor that influences creative success? Volume produced.
Use the 70-20-10 Rule:
- 70% of your work will not be incredible
- 20% will be alright
- 10% will be amazing
If you’re avoiding failure, you’re avoiding success.
7. Trying to be good at everything
Normalise saying ‘I don’t know anything about that’ as a successful answer. It’s wildly confident. The most 'successful' people on earth are proud to own their flaws as part of their story.
You will never be an expert on anything by trying to be an expert on everything.